WHACKED

Just read in The Week that the number of euthanized pets in this land has declined since 1970 from 20 million (what massive genocide) to 3 million today, even though our numbers (we who wear collars and are fussed over) have more than doubled since the Days of Carnage. Sounds good, unless you’re one of the three million.

I myself have undergone the procedure and truly it has not “altered” my character a whit. I’m still the pugnacious, feisty, ready-to-rumble canine I was before. My lineage is what it is. You know what they call us… multi in parvo. A lot of dog in a little space. So true. I miss my testicles a tad, however. I liked the way they swung when I walked, gently caressing my inner thighs. But the overall experience was for the good of the breed: We don’t think of our own particular offspring–what humes call “their” children–as paramount. It is our breed that matters in the long term. We esteemed ones (pugs to you) have been around 3,500 years give or take, so we tend to focus like Warren Buffett on long-term gains.

But is spaying/neutering contraception? Would the Church approve? What does Rick Sanitarium think? Will he speak for us and stop the mutilation that ultimately thwarts the act of procreation? I guess he believes we have no souls so we don’t count…. Little does he know…

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One thought on “WHACKED

  1. Mom says:

    That’s pretty cute, Jack. Sorry about your testicles, though.

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